Just Call Me Thomas

It’s probably not a surprise to you that know me, but if I believed in patron saints as such Thomas would be mine. You know Thomas, the guy that wrongly got saddled with the descriptive “Doubting”. The “D” word properly given him is “Didymus”, which means twin. I say wrongly because, though ol’ Thomas was a doubter, it seems he was no more of a doubter than his brethren. He was just more open about it.

It was him that wanted to touch the resurrected Jesus’ side and the wounds in his hands. The cool thing was that Jesus let him do just that. Then Jesus said “Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.” It was my spiritual twin that answered Jesus call to go to Lazarus grave with “Let us also go, that we may die with him.” Maybe he was being brave, maybe he was being a bit sarcastic/dark. I tend to skew towards believing the latter. A bit of an Eeyore, that Thomas.

I’m not saying that I require the same level of proof that Thomas did. I don’t demand that Jesus appear to me and let me examine him in that manner. Still, I have doubts and often think of how great it would be to have some actual proof of that which I believe. I, for one, don’t think that there’s anything sinful in that. Having occasional doubts is a natural part of one’s spiritual walk. At least it has been with me.

The substance of the doubt that I have is actually less about God’s existence or the nature of Jesus’ sacrifice (though even that is in the mix from time to time) and more about trying to parse out “the truth” as it gets handed to me by other people. If I hear that God is this and such or that the universe came about thanks to that process or according to this theory then I immediately quirk an eyebrow. It happens so much that I look rather like Leonard Nimoy.

See, I have friends that seem dead certain when it comes to the “big things” on both sides of the religious spectrum. They know what they know and God/Dawkins help anyone that crosses blades with them. In a way I admire and respect that. That certainty can come off as arrogant (I suppose that could be just my jealousy talking), but I have to admit I’d love to be among the “blessed” that have not seen and yet believed. Still, if it’s possible to be a Christian Skeptic then I think Thomas and I fall into that category.

Does that cause some dissonance in my life? Sure. it makes accepting the more fantastical elements of my belief system hard, which are to be frank most of my belief system. It also makes accepting that which science has “proven” pretty challenging too. It could be, and has been, argued that that’s simply because I don’t fully understand the relative proofs that both sides have to offer. I’m willing to accept that, just as I’m willing to put my fingers in the holes that are in those theories on offer.

In closing, just so you know and to get it out of the way, I am aware that the mere belief in God could be said to blow the whole notion of a Christian Skeptic out of the water. I mean after all, where is the proof of God or of Christ? Why do I believe in them? I submit now,as I always have, that either belief you have concerning God, pro- or con-, is a matter of faith. So just as you can be an atheist skeptic, I can be a believing one.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Christopher-Walker/726086078 Christopher Walker

    Are faith and reason irreconcilable? I think they are reconcilable. I think science and faith are reconcilable. Some people don't like to put the two on the same playing field; they will say you cannot be reasonable by believing in something which cannot be seen. I have a question for them. Do they believe in thoughts? Do they believe in ideas? Do they believe in the scientific method–itself an idea? These cannot be seen, but they are real things. The division between reason and irrationality is not one of mere physicalism, it seems to me.

    I am skeptical of things too. I'm skeptical about whether God really cares about little old me in such a way that he talks daily to me. Some people claim to hear God's voice, or his prompting. I thought I used to, but now I'm not so sure. It makes me wonder… does God talk to us like that? Is it a matter of course for the average Christian in the world to feel God leading us this way or that? I don't get it anymore.

  • sidfaiwu

    Great post, Scott. Yeah, “Christian skeptic” is a descent label – though the non-succinct “a Christian with skeptic leanings” would probably be more accurate because of the number of things you do choose to take on faith. There are many skeptics that believe in a god, though they are probably a minority. These individuals are almost all deists of one sort or another – everything from Paine fans to individuals with a vague notion of a higher power to a type of pantheist.

    It's also possible to compartmentalize one's thinking so that one's skepticism only applies to certain things. Actually, almost all believers do this all the time when they readily accept the miracles of their own faith while doubting those of competing belief systems (“Jesus walked on water, sure, but I can't believe Mohamed flew to heaven on a burning chariot. I mean, where's the proof?”).

    “If I hear that God is this and such or that the universe came about thanks to that process or according to this theory then I immediately quirk an eyebrow.”

    Ah! In indirect reference to one of my favorite philosophy topics: the cosmological argument. It was actually how I was able to simultaneously maintain my skepticism and my deism for a few years. It's also why, intellectually speaking I am still an agnostic. What started it all? I don't know. Partially because it seems to me that any answer, whether natural or divine, begs the question “Well what started that then?”

  • decipheryourself

    I think doubt is the sign of a healthy, working mind. In general, that skepticism protects you from some bad decisions. See “The Invention of Lying” for more information. From my church days, I picked up the tidbit that I still agree with: untested (undoubted) faith is not real faith.

    Thomas getting his shot was so frustrating for me–someone else getting the chance to see and experience this stuff first hand, but not me. Not out of jealousy, but because of how it would helped my faith. As a young kid I would pray/wish for god to make even a small sign for me. I was willing to accept the step down in status that would come with having to “see to believe” that you are referencing. Over time, the lack of signs became a pretty clear sign itself.

    They say “seeing is believing” precisely becasue of how skeptical we naturally are. I'm sure some Christians view a certian amount of skepticism as God-created. 'Cause, you know… those Mormons really went off the deep end!

    I'm interested in science, but am skeptical too. In attempting to measure and identify things, science offers explanations that make sense without a point of reference. It reaches past cultural and belief lines to something we have in common… rationale. I don't think religion and science are the polar opposites they are often made out to be. One's philosophy (and religion) can constantly change during his life. But the atheist and the Christian can agree on (many, not all) scientific principles. It does not work in reverse.

    Rather than inject too much of my own analysis of what doubt means for you personally, I'll just say that I'm happy you have questions and aren't a mindless follower.

  • RobAC

    To add a little confusion, I personally would substitute the word agnostic for skeptic. I do not use the term to necessarily refer to a belief in God, but in its more general sense of “without knowledge” which is what it would mean in Greek. As a thorough going subjectivist,I am epistemologically an agnostic. I do not “know” anything, but I “believe” a great many things. I am a Christian because I accept many of the traditional teachings of the church about God and Jesus, but I recognize that this is a subjective endeavor just as my acceptance of much of modern science is a subjective endeavor. We strive to the best of our abilities to believe correctly, but it is impossible to get past our personal filters.

  • theleadheretic

    If we never had doubts about our faith we would never question. If we never questioned our faith we would never grow. Without growth we simply become stagnant. Never be afraid to doubt. Never be afraid to ask the questions. The moment we think we have it all figured out is the moment we have become a fool.

  • spiritualtramp

    I certainly agree that doubt is the sign of a working mind. However I think there are things we all choose to accept at face value on faith. These things are naturally different from person to person.

    What would you say you accept on faith?

  • spiritualtramp

    Well I think they would argue that there is evidence for thought and scientific method. It can't be seen, but then air can't be seen. It can be measured though.

  • spiritualtramp

    Yeah a Christian with skeptic leanings is more accurate. Though sometimes I feel like a skeptic with Christian leanings.

    What would you say you compartmentalize?

  • spiritualtramp

    The only problem I see with that is the amount of baggage that that label carries. Of course all labels carry some baggage with them by necessity. It is accurate though.

  • sidfaiwu

    See, the thing about compartmentalizing in that way is the person doing it is very rarely aware of it. The same is true of all the cognitive biases that afflict everyone. I am no different. However, I think politics is one area. I probably apply critical thinking much more rigorously to conservative claims than to liberal ones. My susceptibility in this area is why I rarely enter into political debates in areas I know little about.

  • spiritualtramp

    Amen and welcome to the blog if this is your first visit.

  • decipheryourself

    I believe that the mail will be in the box when I get home, but I don't expect anything “fun”. I've learned how often it tends to be bills or junk. Skepticism helps lessen disappointment.

    When I was a kid, I never questioned if I was safe when a parent drove me somewhere. But as I grew up, and began driving myself… I began to realize how unsafe the road can be.

    When I was a kid, I never questioned the reality of Bible stories. But as I grew up and found all other myth was simply storytelling… I began to realize how foolish basing my life on this one particular myth would be.

    I accept things on faith. That it will get colder before the year ends. That the stranger at my door is selling something. That people tend to behave selfishly. But if my faith in these things are tested, so what? I haven't built those beliefs into the foundation of who I am. My life doesn't unravel if I'm wrong.

    I guess my “faith” is based mostly on my experiences. With the exception of one particular aspect of their beliefs, Christians are this way too–they are living in the “last days” and yet buy new decorations for the house.

  • sidfaiwu

    Sounds to me like you have the exact same faith as I do – a faith in inductive reasoning. In fact, every same person believes that past experience is the best predictor of future behavior. Beyond that, I have no faith. Religionists, on the other hand, have additional faiths that are not universal the way induction is.

  • decipheryourself

    Agreed, and well put!

  • theleadheretic

    If we never had doubts about our faith we would never question. If we never questioned our faith we would never grow. Without growth we simply become stagnant. Never be afraid to doubt. Never be afraid to ask the questions. The moment we think we have it all figured out is the moment we have become a fool.

  • spiritualtramp

    I certainly agree that doubt is the sign of a working mind. However I think there are things we all choose to accept at face value on faith. These things are naturally different from person to person.

    What would you say you accept on faith?

  • spiritualtramp

    Well I think they would argue that there is evidence for thought and scientific method. It can't be seen, but then air can't be seen. It can be measured though.

  • spiritualtramp

    Yeah a Christian with skeptic leanings is more accurate. Though sometimes I feel like a skeptic with Christian leanings.

    What would you say you compartmentalize?

  • spiritualtramp

    The only problem I see with that is the amount of baggage that that label carries. Of course all labels carry some baggage with them by necessity. It is accurate though.

  • sidfaiwu

    See, the thing about compartmentalizing in that way is the person doing it is very rarely aware of it. The same is true of all the cognitive biases that afflict everyone. I am no different. However, I think politics is one area. I probably apply critical thinking much more rigorously to conservative claims than to liberal ones. My susceptibility in this area is why I rarely enter into political debates in areas I know little about.

  • spiritualtramp

    Amen and welcome to the blog if this is your first visit.

  • decipheryourself

    I believe that the mail will be in the box when I get home, but I don't expect anything “fun”. I've learned how often it tends to be bills or junk. Skepticism helps lessen disappointment.

    When I was a kid, I never questioned if I was safe when a parent drove me somewhere. But as I grew up, and began driving myself… I began to realize how unsafe the road can be.

    When I was a kid, I never questioned the reality of Bible stories. But as I grew up and found all other myth was simply storytelling… I began to realize how foolish basing my life on this one particular myth would be.

    I accept things on faith. That it will get colder before the year ends. That the stranger at my door is selling something. That people tend to behave selfishly. But if my faith in these things are tested, so what? I haven't built those beliefs into the foundation of who I am. My life doesn't unravel if I'm wrong.

    I guess my “faith” is based mostly on my experiences. With the exception of one particular aspect of their beliefs, Christians are this way too–they are living in the “last days” and yet buy new decorations for the house.

  • sidfaiwu

    Sounds to me like you have the exact same faith as I do – a faith in inductive reasoning. In fact, every same person believes that past experience is the best predictor of future behavior. Beyond that, I have no faith. Religionists, on the other hand, have additional faiths that are not universal the way induction is.

  • decipheryourself

    Agreed, and well put!