I was chatting with Sidfaiwu, a good friend of mine, about another good friend Davey B. and it occurred to me that I have, comparatively speaking, a pretty broad spectrum of friends both irl and online when it comes to religion/politcal beliefs.  That’s not  really on purpose as such, as I don’t know if one chooses one’s friends.  I, at least, don’t remember consciously saying “Oh I’m gonna be friends with him.”

I agree with C.S. Lewis when he said, “Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.”    I share something in common with all of my friends.  That “thing”, the primary friendship driver is almost never religious in nature.  In fact I can’t think of a single instance where it was.

Many Christians seem to limit their close friendships to only fellow believers and then only believers that believe the same as them.  I don’t think that’s a conscious decision in most cases so much as it’s just part of the reality that many times we as Christians limit our interaction with others to church activities (a different post).  Or maybe I’m wrong, maybe it is conscious.  Many of my brothers choose to only consume Christian art and fill their time with activities that are mostly spiritual in nature.  Are there people that do the same thing with relationships?

If so I think that’s incredibly misguided.

I’m not saying you should go out of your way to make friends outside your faith just for the sake of doing it.  I also don’t think that you should make friends with someone solely for the purpose of evangelism (though if you aren’t evangelizing your friends in some way then I don’t think that’s good either).  I’m just saying when it comes to friendships/acquaintances variety isn’t a bad thing and can in fact be a wonderful thing.

One major benefit as I see it to having friends you disagree with when it comes to these issues the fresh perspective it can bring.  Thanks to my wife I know how some conservatives think (and yes they do think).  Thanks to Sid I have a clearer idea of the atheist pov.  I realize I’m generalizing here and that neither person is 100% representative of their own self-identified groups, but hopefully you see my point.  It’s also harder to set up a straw man when you are putting a face on that hay filled head.

Now I now some of the Christians in the audience might be thinking that there is a pitfall here.  Might not having an atheist or a scientologist or a democrat or whatever friend “drag me down” somehow?  I suppose that’s possible.  I’m not advocating that one dumps one’s friends who are of a like mind.  That would be silly.  But, if the only “defense” you have against the “others” is hiding in the herd (whatever herd that is) don’t you belong here?

So, go out and hug someone who you disagree with.  Buy them a beer.  Find some common ground.